⁠This post was written on Martin Luther King Jr Day on Monday, January 18th, 2021. The week of President Joe Biden’s inauguration.

Last week, I was spit on.

I was walking down the street, minding my own business when a guy walked near me and spit in my direction.

I didn’t make out what he said, but he said something like “_(?)_, you b*tch!”

I stepped back and said “Hey! What the f*ck!” 

The guy kept walking. 

I was startled and taken aback for a moment. What happened after that, I did not expect.

I immediately went into a prayer.

Honestly, I was surprised myself. 

The prayer was for myself, but it was also for him. For the past year, I have gotten accustomed to praying for the homeless I see on the street. Especially those who seem to be taken by demons. So it seems my prayer mode immediately kicked in.

After my prayer, I noticed something. 

I have been spit on before, and afterwards, I am usually in fear and in shame. But this time, I didn’t feel fear or shame. I was rattled, but this was different. I didn’t shrink.

I don’t know why this person spat at me. I couldn’t make out what he said except for the “You b*tch.” Through this, I could insinuate that he was spewing hate on me because I am a woman. It’s possible. And in the past, my brain most definitely would have gone there.

As I walked pondering about what just happened, I realized that it really didn’t matter why he spat on me. Because my dignity cannot be taken, if I do not have shame within me.

I did not feel shame, because I know I am not shameful.

On this day, it makes me think of all of the brave Light warriors in the Civil Rights movement. All of the hate spewed on them as they staged sit-ins, marches as they fought for their Rights. They were beyond just spit-on.

As Martin Luther King Jr said: “One’s dignity may be assaulted, vandalized, cruelly mocked, but it can never be taken away unless it is surrendered.” 

As we move into this week. I pray for the world, that we can hold Dr. King’s vision. 

Whatever happens. Remember that our dignity cannot be taken, unless we allow the darkness to do so. 

Remember your Light. Remember your Love.

In gratitude, Bonnie
💜🌈🌞✨

All of my life, I was fighting to show I was special.

My parents were not the type to tell me I was special, and I didn’t feel special. They thought I would have an ordinary life. Grow up, get married, have kids. 

I resented that this was what they thought I would become, so I rebelled. I envisioned myself as something else.

I set out on a life to show I was special. I became independent. Successful in an analytical career. Going on adventures, eating incredible food locally and around the world. I did enjoy these things, to a certain extent. It certainly fulfilled my ego to show them they were wrong.

I was fighting so hard to show that I am special, that I missed something that was calling out deep inside me, that I was ignoring.

Really, I am quite simple.

In my deepest of hearts, what I really am, is a simple heart.

In a meditation a few months ago, Mary Magdalene showed me this. She invited me to a white chapel. As I looked around, the chapel was small, quaint, filled with light, but not too much. She walked into my little chapel and held my hand.

Mary Magdalene said to me, “Look at this place. This is the place of your heart.”

Inside, there were no signs of the successful career I’d had, or the cool adventures I had been on. Really, there was nothing, but pews, and a table. It wasn’t even decorated. There were two jars representing my beloved late cats, Leo and Paintfoot in the corner. That was it.

I’d been running from my simple heart, my entire life.

Really, I know that deep down, this was what my parents had recognized within me, as a child. It wasn’t a bad thing. I was innocent, and there was part of them that was scared I’d be eaten up by a nasty world. 

I had taken this cue as needing to toughen up. 

And maybe I did. Maybe all of my path was meant to be. 

So that I can come back.

And know the worth of my simple heart.

In gratitude, Bonnie
💜🌈🌞✨

Sometimes we get wrapped up in the worry of making the wrong decision. 

And so we think and think and think. Is it this way? Or that way?

For those of us, who are Spiritually inclined / Starseeds / Lightworkers. What we fear the most….

Is making the wrong decision in the eyes of God / The Universe / Higher Self.

We have the power of choice.

But there are no wrong decisions.

Each decision we make takes us on a journey or path that may be slightly different than the other.

But it is never wrong.

Especially in the eyes of God / The Universe / Higher Self

Each path brings its own set of opportunities and challenges. 

Even as we see two paths – one that is scary; one that is more within our comfort zone. Neither is right or wrong.

Each contains something to learn. Discoveries to be made. In its own way. With its own processes.

God / The Universe / The Higher Self has no judgement on you. 

It is always loving and compassionate.

It is us, who won’t give loving kindness and compassion towards ourselves.

Give yourself permission to be wherever you are in your decision-making.

There are no wrong decisions. 

Let every decision be okay.

Love yourself, ya’ll

In gratitude, Bonnie
💜🌈🌞✨

As Lightworkers, Spiritual Seekers or “Good People” – however you identify, we often suppress our ego. 

Like a dog that’s stolen a bone, we tell it “NO!” We tell it “Bad dog!” or “Bad ego!” 

We feel it wanting to come up to the surface. It wants to say something, but we don’t allow it a voice.

We think: We must be humble. We must be positive vibes. We must have gratitude. When we’re in that energy, and feeling that, then that’s cool. This is not what our life composes of 100% of the time. This is also not the goal of life.

There are times in our life when we come upon situations when our ego wants to come to the surface. 

When you feel that ego urge, let it speak. When we let the ego speak, we uncover a part of ourselves that is really hurting. We need to allow that hurt to have a voice. That hurt can hold your heart’s true desire hostage… until your hurt is heard, we cannot access the deep desire, or love, or joy that is buried within. 

I for one, have most of my life tried to bury my ego. I didn’t want people to think I am a bad person. I hid behind a veil of humility. It’s not that I didn’t have any humility, but I used my humility to not see that I have an ego-side as well. I was only deceiving myself.

So if your ego wants to speak, let it speak. Give it room to speak. It may speak only to you. It may even speak to someone else. If we let it speak softly, then it can come out with gentleness, instead of being pushed out in anger. 

An Incantation:

Please God / The Universe / Higher Self. I honor my ego. To honor my ego is to honor my pain. Help me release that within me that wants to keep the ego in a cage. Give me the strength to listen to my ego, so that I can heal.

⁠
In gratitude, Bonnie
💜🌈🌞✨

The word Surrender is sometimes misinterpreted. Some imagine signing over their life to church, to “god”, to some guru who wants to make you his 12th wife. If this is happening to you, please call the FBI (!)⁠⁠

To surrender is quite simple, but not easy. ⁠

To surrender is to let go of all possible outcomes. ⁠

To surrender is to let go of any control. ⁠⁠

To surrender is to free ourselves from the burden of control.⁠

To surrender is to trust so much in ourselves and the Universe, that we do not force things to happen.⁠⁠

This does not mean we cannot have desire, or take action. It does not mean we do not speak our truth when something needs to be said. ⁠

It means, we have the desire, we wish it for ourselves, then we let it go.⁠⁠

It means, we speak our truth, tell someone how we feel, then, we do not control their thoughts.⁠

It means, we take action, then trust that whatever the Universe brings back to us is for our best and highest good.⁠

When we control, we think we are being careful by controlling. But control is actually a burden. When we do not surrender, and instead we choose to control – we think and think and think. And we get more and more and more anxious. ⁠

The mind cannot handle it. It cannot fathom all the possibilities the Universe can provide to us and for us.

When we let go of it all, we also open to it all.

Free your heart. Free your mind. Surrender.⁠

An Incantation for Today:⁠

Please God / The Universe / Higher Self. Help me surrender. Help me let go of any need to control, all possible outcomes and to know that any outcome I receive is for the highest good for me and all involved. ⁠

⁠
In gratitude, Bonnie
💜🌈🌞✨